Growing Old Or Grown Up?

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 1 Corinthians 13:11  NKJV

When we are children, we cannot wait to grow up. We long for the days of making all our own decisions, doing what we want-when we want, and answering to no one. We're grown! We've arrived! In the words of Janet Jackson, we want to be in control. We never take into consideration what this entails. Responsibilities. Jobs. Health issues. Financial setbacks. Errant children. Aging parents. And the list goes on and on and on. But not being psychic and being immature, we live in the moment, and the moment knows nothing about how hard knocked life can get.

Most of us, grudgingly rise to the occasion, face the music and handle our business. We may groan, moan and complain, but miraculously by the grace of God, we get through the valleys and revel in the mountain tops. We grew up. Adults in every sense of the word.

However, there are some, whom age chronologically, but they don't fully mature. Some never grow up at all. Some are doing the exact same things they did 20-30-40 years ago. They give little thought to the future, help no one but themselves and treat and interact with others in their retarded mental state. Going from woman to woman, man to man, still trying to recapture the "glory days," when they had no paunch, and shapes like coca cola bottles. They're still hanging out in clubs, wearing clothing that should be given to younger relatives or Goodwill. They're spreading around their four syllable words trying to impress and using most of them out of context. They work and amass nothing. Just good time Charlies/Charlottes. Or worse yet, they're in churches, doing the same thing, swapping out church for clubs, hearing the word, but it taking no root. Most have very little conscious and therefore could not give a whit about any one's feelings apart from their own. Playing games with no shame.

Question is, who's to blame for this? Did their parents not give them what they needed to be well rounded, fully developed human beings? Or were their lives so fraught with dysfunction, that some how it impeded their mental growth? What happened to them? Who dropped them? Or could it be, they alone decided that they would be narcissistic and all about themselves? Unable to communicate and afraid of confrontation, man/women babies are perfectly OK with walking away from their offspring, loving spouses/mates, many times without a second thought, to continue in their narcissistic behavior, believing, in err, that the world evolves solely around them. They believe they are the sun. And those who fly too close will get burned.

They're easy to spot. Most still live at home, or worse yet, in their mom's basement. I really don't think we can be mad at the man woman/-babies, they probably don't even know that their maturity is stunted. It's kinda of sad. So instead of being enraged at those who, for whatever reason will not grow up, even into their 40s-50s-and 60s, I say they are to be pitied, and prayed for. Probably even the one whom inhabits the oval. So lets make that 70s as well.

Admittedly, we all probably have areas where there is room for growth. No one is perfect, no not one, the good book says. I, personally petition God everyday, less of me, more of thee. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Psalm 51:10

If it's possible, talk to them. find out what makes them stuck/stagnant. Do it with love and concern. If they're receptive, that's wonderful. If they are not, and it irritates you, remember, some we are called to love from afar. Pray for them. Love them. But re-evaluate how you interact with them for your own peace of mind. Let peace always lead the way.

You're the keeper of the castle, so be a father to your children. A provider of all their daily needs. Like a sovereign lord protector, Be their best friend, please direct them, and they'll do well to follow where you lead.

You're the keeper of the castle, so be a good man to your lady, the creator of the sunshine in her day. In the garden that you seeded, be a friend when a friend is needed. You won't have to look the other way. 
Sung by the Four Tops, circa 1972. Written by Dennis Lambert and Brian Potter.

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Kupendana